


I kept the feeling inside a box

by AnnieJ



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Denial, Donghyuck is leaving mark, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Pining, mark’s denial, mark’s getting insane, they’re bestfriend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-15
Updated: 2018-05-15
Packaged: 2019-05-07 12:50:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14671470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnieJ/pseuds/AnnieJ
Summary: Donghyuck’s going to leave mark to go back to his hometownMark’s not sure that he could handle it without telling Donghyuck how he felt.Markhyuck au where Mark is pining so hard and constantly on denial.





	I kept the feeling inside a box

**Author's Note:**

> i edited the story and repost it  
> enjoy!xx

Mark comes home to an empty bed.  
his hands are too cold.

Today  
9 AM.

Donghyuck is sleeping over, on Mark’s bed, his face is pressed to Mark’s chest. Sleeping so peacefully. Mark’s staring at the younger boy like he always does in the morning.

Donghyuck always sleeps like this. Cuddled up between Mark’s body. His body is warm. Sometimes it reminded Mark of summer. He likes it like this. He could see Donghyuck’s soft face. His eyelashes, long and pretty. His lips, soft and pink.  
He presses the urge to trace Donghyuck’s jaw and kiss it because that would be just... weird right?

Mark thinks he’s not fully awake yet so he just shrugs it away.

10 AM.  
Donghyuck’s making pancakes for Mark while the older boy waits for him on the table. His place smells like strawberries now. Hyuck’s favorite.

Mark’s watching the younger boy from the table,  
smiling a little bit too fondly. He wants to hug Donghyuck from behind (but not romantically—just to annoy him because he’s too serious when he cooks.)

Mark thinks Donghyuck is cute when he’s serious like this, though.  
And he’s still not gonna say anything about the way his heart stops everytime Donghyuck smiles at him.  
He’s not going to name anything to it.

1 PM  
Mark’s head is on Donghyuck’s lap. The tv is playing some okd movies they both too lazy to change. They’re just stalling time now because Donghyuck will go back to his hometown for 2 weeks today and his train is at the same time as Mark’s class.  
Mark’s starting to think that maybe bailing his class to accompany Donghyuck doesn’t sound so bad after all.

The truth is,  
He just wants more time with this boy.  
He will miss him, that’s for sure.  
But there are also words that’s dying to slip out of his tounge but he doesn’t have the courage to find it. Or speak it outloud. (that’s even worse)

Like every feelings that he has when it comes to Donghyuck, he just presses it down and locks it in a box he still could not name.  
(It is childish. He knows. But it is not his fault that he never felt like this before.)

Donghyuck’s playing with Mark’s hair now. They do this all the time, but somehow today, Mark feels uneasy. The heat is building up on his skin.

“Hyung, don’t you have class soon? Why aren’t you leaving?.” Donghyuck asks him.

Mark doesn’t answer the question. It’s all blurry now. Instead, he kept on staring at Donghyuck.  
(The box is too full. Mark’s afraid its going to blow up right in front of Hyuck. He’s so fucking scared.)

But he puts his last hope that maybe he could move all his feelings into bigger boxes. One that wouldn’t blow up just from staring at the younger boy. And like so many times that he did this before, he presses the feelings again.

Turns out his eyes wouldn’t move an inch away and he has been staring at the younger boy for a while now but Donghyuck hasn’t looked away either so he keeps on tracing him like he wanted to remember Donghyuck’s face before he leaves.  
(That’s stupid. He sees the boy everyday.)

(Mark’s looking at Donghyuck’s lips. it is the colour between red and orange and he remembers summer again. Summer. He used to hate the season before Donghyuck came. It was all sweats and sticky skins but after the younger boy became his friend, he started to hate it less and less because Donghyuck would fill the season with everything that makes Mark so damn happy. Now he’s sure that he probably loves summer. Especially when it is outlined on Donghyuck’s skin.)

Mark doesn’t realize iy but Donghyuck’s clearly blushing all this time. He throws Mark off his lap after his face turns red and the older boy falls to the floor, head first.

“Okay, Hyung, you’re being weird. Im leaving. I need to pack my lunch.” Donghyuck scrambles off the sofa, the colour red is still painted on his cheeks.

Instead of getting up, Mark stays laying on the floor. Looking up at the ceilings around him, he realizes that it is all printed with Donghyuck’s name. The walls that he repainted with the colour yellow (because it’s Donghyuck’s favourite colour) last week now screams Donghyuck’s name. Donghyuck also started to picks Mark’s sheets and he buys new pillows for the sofa and so the furniture is starting to fit more into Donghyuck’s personality instead of his. The bed that he slept on smells like Donghyuck’s perfume because he slept on it for so long. Everything is about Donghyuck. Every corners, ceiling, wall, furniture.

Mark just realizes that he really doesn’t mind.  
He actually thinks that he loves it like this.

(The box breaks. His feelings are splattered around like new paint.)

He gets up and Mark thinks that he cannot do this anymore. If this is the last time in weeks that he will see Hyuck (but even the matching toothbrushes on his bathroom will remind him of the sunkissed boy), he needs to do something.

Mark walks to the kitchen and he pulls Donghyuck’s hands, pushing him to the kitchen counter and Mark held his breath.  
Mark is so fucking scared and his hands are trembling because if he could name this feeling, everything will be different. And he’s scared that Donghyuck will leave and took everything that has his name printed on it with him. He’s afraid that he would have to repaint the walls again and he’s afraid that it would still screams Donghyuck’s name even after he did it 100 times.  
He’s afraid to lose Donghyuck.

Donghyuck puts his hand on Mark’s shoulder. Mark’s still shivering.  
“Lee Minhyung, Mark lee, come on. You should just let everything out before it kills you. I am giving you time before i figure it out for you.”  
Mark blushes. He’s still questioning if Donghyuck knew his feelings even before the box opened,  
but of course, of course Donghyuck already knew.

So Mark just asks the question that just pops up first on his head.  
“Are you going to leave me and take everything with you?”

Donghyuck smiles. Knowing exactly how Mark would be. His fears, his anxieties. Donghyuck knows it like the back of his hand.

“Of course not. I basically live here.”  
He puts some playfulness into the words, because Mark’s cute like this. He wants to at least play along. 

Mark’s still so serious. His head is a tangled mess.  
“No, Donghyuck. I don’t mean after the trip,” Mark sighs “I mean after i say this. Will you leave?”  
Mark’s scared. He’s really fucking scared.  
What if he couldn't face summer anymore?

Donghyuck took a deep breath. His eyes never leaving Mark’s face. He’s so fond of the older boy, sometimes he’s confused that Mark still couldn’t tell. So he says the obvious, to calm the older boy down. To stop the hiding game they’re pretty bad at playing.  
“Hyung, i know. I wont. And i will beat you up to this. Now, I love you, why would i leave?”

The world stops a bit to cheer them on.  
Mark looks up. The feeling that he could not name is sliding off Donghyuck’s tongue so easily. He must be hearing things wrong.

Donghyuck could see Mark’s unsure face. He wants to laugh but he held it in.  
“Oh come on! Do you not believe me? i literally make breakfast every morning for you. I make hearts pancakes! I sleep on your bed and cuddles with you. Play with your hair. Who does that as platonic friends? I love you, Hyung. Why are you so fucking stupid?”  
The smile on Donghyuck’s face is big and he just wants to reassure Mark that he’s telling the truth.

But Mark’s too fucking shocked to grasp it.  
“I..I mean..But I...” he stutters.

Donghyuck beats him again.  
“I know, you love me too. I could see it on your eyes. Everyone could tell, Hyung. You literally have heart eyes everytime you look at me. You let me paint your nails. You kiss me on mornings when you thought i was not awake yet. You bought me toothbrush, cups, blankets. Painted your walls with my favourite colour, and i don’t even live here! You’re fucking stupid, aren’t you?”

Mark goes silent again.  
His head is still a mess.  
He cursed the boxes for not holding things together. For not holding anything, even.

Donghyuck pulls Mark closer. He hugs the older boy until Mark could feel like it is summer again.  
Mark finally feels like he could breathe.

He lets the words out.  
“Sorry Hyuck, I love you.”

Donghyuck laughs.  
Mark loves the sound of it, It is like a summer song. He finally thinks that he could bear the 2 weeks without the younger boy when he could get hugs like these anytime now.

“I love you too, Mark Hyung.”

(They kisssed and Donghyuck missed his train and Mark missed his class. They both didn’t regret it one bit)

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this!  
> please leave comments and kudos if you did!   
> thankyou xxx


End file.
